Commencing... everything!

Wow... an incredibly busy month for me. THREE trips to Maryland from Upstate New York! and I'm sure I put 5000 miles on my car!

The first trip, we celebrated birthdays and Mother's Day in May. HA! Sister's birthday May 10th (she turned 50), Mom turned 79 on the 11th, my oldest grandson was 12 on the 12th, and Mothers Day was on the 13th. HELLO! That's a lot of celebrating ! (unfortunately grandson got the short end, but his mom threw a party for him the next weekend.)

A week later I was back for a graduation ceremony -- 9:00 a.m. on a Thursday morning? -- and the party wasn't until Saturday, and I could NOT leave before the party! Back home for 3 days, then BACK to Maryland for my baby boy's wedding. Man, when did he grow up? From knucklehead high schooler to cool grown up to.... husband! Whew? But it was fun. His wife is awesome and her parents were awesome and we just had a great time. Photos here if you're interested :-)

I'm a photographer, and I used to photograph a lot of weddings, so I got to hear the wedding vows every weekend or couple of weekends, and it used to keep those words fresh in my mind. I believe it helped hold my (last) marriage together, as long as it did. Spaced repetition -- you've heard me say it before.

Well... part of my many travels last month was my niece's high school graduation. Not just any niece, mind you, but my baby sister's ONLY child, so you know there's no way on the planet I would miss that one. Besides, I'm her favorite uncle -- not that she ever actually said that... exactly (cough), but I just "assumed the position" :-) and she was kind enough not to contradict me (see? still respect for one's elders out there. LOL.)

Anyway, it had been a couple of years since I'd attended a commencement, and while I was sitting there listening to the speakers speak, I got pretty jazzed, listening to them telling all those young people about achieving their dreams and goals and working for humanity and don't let anything stop you and remember your strengths and you can do it! It took me back and made me remember other commencement ceremonies and other dreams and ... well, I just started thinking how nice it would be if, like hearing those wedding vows every couple of weeks, we could all hear a commencement address every few weeks or so, and stay plugged into that incredible HOPE and enthusiasm and fervor that graduating seniors have for conquering the world! Wouldn't that be awesome?

Once we get out in the world, sometimes it's all too easy to forget; get the shine taken off our apples, have our lights dimmed by the someone else's idea of reality, and by the day to day things that try to slow us down, just to see if we're tough enough to step over -- or climb across -- them to keep going. Some of us do and... some of us get bogged down or disillusioned, and if we just could hear that commencement message one more time, we'd realize... it's all part of winning; you don't appreciate a victory unless you had something to overcome! Do you? So much more fun when had to snatch that victory from the jaws of defeat. Yeah!

So how long's it been for you? Go back in your mind and remember the last commencement exercise you attended. Remember the feelings; remember that sense of "we can accomplish anything", remember that "we're gonna make a difference in the world" mind set that those graduating seniors -- your graduating seniors -- had... and replay that speech, refocusrekindle that fire and... go kick some butt !

Next time you have a chance to go to a commencement ceremony... get a ticket; go, listen, re-energize, live your dreams. Of course, don't wait for a commencement, just remember... and pick up where you left off that energy, (if you left off).

Have an awesome day.


Kelvin

The Year of the Internet Friend!

I get emails all the time saying, "this is National Friendship Week..."; so often, in fact, that I wonder when -- or if -- National Friendship Week really is! And, of course, there's always these peppy sentimental things to do, messages to say, to repeat, to pass on, and often ruined -- in my opinion -- by one of those guilt messages that says, "if I don't get this back, I'll take the hint." Well we'll pass on my opinion of that particular practice for the time being, but it's nice to be thought about during Friendship Week... in a mass email... that went to people the originator probably doesn't even remember they put ON their jokelist to begin with (I'm smiling, by the way).

It's quite a different story, however, when you an email from a friend who says "hey, I'm going to be at the airport on Wednesday between 9:30 and noon and it would be grrrrrreat if we could meet up.... so we can finally meet each other in person!" Such was the case this week with my friend LInda from "up north" who came through. We've tried unsuccessfully for years to meet at one time or another but life circumstances on both our parts just kept getting in the way, but this time... it worked. Kewwwwwllllllll !

You've heard me speak of the woman I've been friends with for years and whose family sent my son care packages in Iraq and I couldn't remember how long we'd known each other. Well last week, she told me.... "because you were the first person to send me an email on my new computer and I got it in 1993... so 14 years!" Met via email, mother of a friend of a friend of my brother... ended up corresponding accidentally because of a darned jokelist (probably something I received during National Friendship Week in 1993...) and here we finally met 14 years later... and it was cool. So now I'm making it a point to go visit her and her whole family in June. I think we're making it a state holiday and giving everyone a day off. I'll get back to you on that one.

BUT... as in last post, maybe this IS the Year of the Internet Friend! Two down and... hmmm.. how many to go? Gotta see if I can get to St. Louis to see Dan and...California to see Sue and....heck, there's Steph in Chattanooga and Roger in Dallas and... heck! why don't I just make out a goal's list. Ya think? Hmmmmm. I'll let ya know how it goes.

Have an awesome day.

Kelvin

Today, I Met a Friend . . .

I've always said that internet friendships are some of the best, or at least can be. You meet someone on the internet, via a joke list or just in a chat room, and you get a conversation going and find out about the person behind the typing.

Internet friendships can exist quite nicely and in the absence of much in the way of visuals, you get to appreciate a person purely on the basis of their conversation and mindset and the way they communicate with you; and in my opinion, communicating via email or chat helps you become a better communicator, because it forces you to be more precise and more literal to avoid misunderstandings. Then, when misunderstandings do occur, it forces you to be get better at explaining your points, so you can get your true ideas over to the other "intelligence" by using words -- (some people aren't real good with words, these days). At least, that's the way I look at it.

So I've many friends -- male and female -- via the net, that I've never met,yet we've become great friends, shared life stories and our humor. Sometimes we've shared photos, but mostly we share caring and share our minds.

Today... in what was almost an accident... I met one of my long time internet friends with whom I've been e-talking since probably 1996 or '97; I don't even remember how I stumbled across them -- or they, me -- but, they ended up on my joke list, then they subscribed to my Ramblings, and we became friends in spite of my babble!

You know the kind of friend I'm talking about, right? Have you ever had a friend that you could always depend on for a kind word, and if you didn't hear from them for a while you felt compelled to check on them and make sure they're okay? Or the kind of friend that when they have a personal tragedy or hardship, you can still help comfort them even though you've never seen them; the kind of friend that you just appreciate for who they are and not what they can do for you... the kind you enjoy just for their sense of humor or their insight or their ability to be real; the kind of friend from whom you have no expectation, other than being themselves... even though you'd never seen them?

Well, today, I met such a friend, whom I've known for years, but just met; and that was pretty cool. So cool, in fact, that it's made me want to meet some of my other internet friends, so I think I'll make that happen. This could turn out to be the year of the internet FRIEND!

This is a good year for it. I'll keep you posted.

Have an awesome day.

Kelvin

Productivity, Not Just Activity

Here I am at the end of a peaceful and productive day -- much more productive than usual. Today, not only did I do things, but I did the right things.

Someone once told me, not to mistake activity for productivity. Generally I *stay* busy, but am I usually busy doing the right things? Often times not :-) I've had many days where I was busy ALLLLLL day, but when I got to the end of it, I hadn't really accomplished anything. Today... was a good, productive day.

To start, I got up this morning, made my pot of coffee then sat down and made my list, then prioritized it like usual.. You see, I KNOW what to do, and how to do it, and I even teach it, but often I don't do the things I advise others to do. But today... I did it right. I made a list of the things I had to accomplish and did the Ben Franklin A, B, C and 1,2,3 within each letter priority. I decided there were TWO things that I HAD to do, so instead of putting them at a high priority like normal, I actually gave them an appointment time... and set the alarm on my Palm Pilot to alert me when it was time. In between the "appointments" I worked on my prioritized list.

Now... admittedly, fixing myself a nice breakfast was NOT on my prioritize list NOR was it an appointment slot, but after I finished making the list, I was suddenly very hungry. So, I cooked up some CRISP bacon, cheese and eggs, a couple of slices of toast from this soft-crusted, honey apple oat bread that I love, got some Smuckers strawberry jam, a small glass of ice cold milk and a fresh cup of coffee... and just... pampered myself. Then, after breakfast, I was ready to tackle my list.

So without drawing this out *too* long, one "appointment" was returning a phone call about doing a some wedding photography, and the other appointment -- later in the day -- was to clean up my son's room! You know, the wonderful kid that comes home on leave from the Navy, trashes the rooms I cleaned up last time he left, and forgets to clean them up again before he leaves? Yeah. THOSE rooms. And although I did move the appointments BACK a couple of times, I finally did get up and go do it, and for the first time in a very long time, I forced myself to do what my calendar and task list told me to do, in the order that I had prioritized it. So the result is... both my major tasks were completed, and nearly all of my "A" tasks -- but I still have a little time left -- just for giggles -- so I think I can finish all the A's before I go to bed in about 20 minutes.

So, that's my day; and I even had time for some socialization and friend emails, and still got my lists done.

While I was cooking breakfast this morning, I was sharing this plan with my friend Jill on the phone. I told her how I didn't do what I taught other people to do, and Jill -- ever so affectionately -- asked, "What is that quote? 'Those that can, do; and those that can't, teach ?..." Ugh. I hate that quote, but it was good motivation -- she knew it would be; that's why I have friends :-). I hate it, but it is very often true in life. Those that can, do. Those that can't... teach.

So at least today, I decided to be a doer. And I'm looking forward to making the same decision... tomorrow. I think I'll make a HABIT of succeeding this way.

How about you?

Have a great night.

Kelvin