I went to work this morning and, as is my occasional custom , I stopped at the little coffee shop to order my "usual" breakfast sandwich - sausage, egg and cheese on dark rye. A wonderful, cheerful young lady staffed the shop. I bid her a fine good morning and said, " I'd like my ceremonial breakfast sandwich and she said, "Okay, but we don't have sausage today..." I said, "hmmmm... that...well... nevermind," and walked away.
SOMETIMES... I want what I want ! and I wanted the sausage, egg and cheese, and I didn't feel like settling for "the next best thing", because... the next best thing is not what I wanted, and it wouldn't have satisfied the "craving." It might have satisfied the immediate hunger pang, but when it was all over (and eaten) ... that "craving" would have still been nagging me.
I like McDonald's Sausage McMuffin with Egg (there may be a trend, here...). It's my ceremonial travel sandwich. When I go on a road trip, I *always* stop at the first McDonald's I get to, and get a Sausage McMuffin with Egg combo, with the crunchy hash browns and the (now not too bad) medium coffee. As is my custom on the last trip, I stopped at Mickey D's, ordered my sandwich... didn't check it, got down the road about 5 minutes... opened it and... it was an Egg McMuffin --hardly the same thing. I ate it! because it was too much hassle to go back BUT... I still had the craving, so... the very next McDonalds I got to -- 15 minutes later -- guess what? I pulled in, ordered my Sausage McMuffin With Egg... CHECKED IT.... ate it.... ahhhh... was good. MMMMmmmmmm. Satisfied the craving. Of course now, I doubled my carbohydrates and was TOO full -- but the craving was satisfied!
We do that a lot in life! We settle for "close... but no cigar." Good 'nuff ! It's not what I really want, but...it's good 'nuff. We do it for cars (well... they didn't have it in burgundy right now, but the white was good 'nuff...); we do it for houses (I really wanted a two-car garage but...there wasn't one right now), we do it for relationships (well, we don't really talk the way I'd like to, but... it'll come; it's good 'nuff for now...). And while sometimes those decisions are necessary, a lot of times... they are not. And very often -- I dare say most of the time -- the "next best thing" we settle for doesn't satisfy the craving, and now we have TWO problems ! Not only don't we have what we want -- and still have the craving -- but NOW.... we're stuck with the color we didn't want, the house that's in the wrong neighborhood, the nasty sandwich, the unfulfilling job we hate, the spouse we can't really talk to or... whatever else is the case !
Sometimes... it just worth it to wait for -- or work for -- what you want. Sometimes... settling for good 'nuff, is not in your best interest. But those are the decisions we have to make every day.
So, before you settle for good 'nuff next time... be sure that you really need to. Sometimes, good 'nuff is right around the corner from the "real deal." After I settled for that white Hyundai Sante Fe back in 2001... the burgundy one came in the next day :-( I *really* liked the burgundy. Oh well... maybe the next time I buy a car.
Have an awesome day.
Kelvin
Friday, September 22, 2006
Saturday, August 26, 2006
To Write or Not to Write...
or rather. . . whether or not to write more often! And after some considerable thought, I've decided to change the format of this blog a bit!
Up to now, I've basically mirrored the publication of my e-newsletter Ramblings, but I only publish Ramblings once a month or so -- when I'm inspired -- and I'm told by bloggers in the know, that that's not enough activity to make a blog worth having, and I get requests for more frequent updates and. . . who I am to disappoint my readers. Therefore, I'll be sharing more frequent thoughts with you, about more varied topics, and probably in shorter runs than the full- bodied email version of Ramblings. Still, I plan to offer concepts worthy of your thought and introspection and you'll still have the option of subscribing to full bodied version, or settling for the timely tidbits offered in our new Ramblings "Lite".
And THIS is as good a time as any to start, so let me do so by revisiting a topic we've partially discussed before! and which
Up to now, I've basically mirrored the publication of my e-newsletter Ramblings, but I only publish Ramblings once a month or so -- when I'm inspired -- and I'm told by bloggers in the know, that that's not enough activity to make a blog worth having, and I get requests for more frequent updates and. . . who I am to disappoint my readers. Therefore, I'll be sharing more frequent thoughts with you, about more varied topics, and probably in shorter runs than the full- bodied email version of Ramblings. Still, I plan to offer concepts worthy of your thought and introspection and you'll still have the option of subscribing to full bodied version, or settling for the timely tidbits offered in our new Ramblings "Lite".
And THIS is as good a time as any to start, so let me do so by revisiting a topic we've partially discussed before! and which
Very often we get caught up in spending a lot of time looking at what's wrong with our existence ! -- bills, world affairs, issues in our marriages, the rowdy neighbor(s) next door, a crappy boss -- and it's easy to get grumpy over what's not great.
The other side of that coin asks what IS right with our existence? Yes, you may have a bill for a new car, but what a great car it is ! Chances are you have your health, your intelligence, your friends, your wit, your (crappy or not) job that's paying at least some of your bills -- even though you might think it's not enough. And you undoubtedly have the benefit of many other things that, if you stop to think about them, could be much worse in your life.
There is a law of attraction that works very powerfully in our lives, and is best summed up -- for me -- by a statement from the book "Illusions, The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah" by Richard Bach:
"We magnetize into our lives, what we hold in our thoughts..."
Sometimes, it's impossible to imagine that many of the things -- especially the negative things -- that are happening in our lives, could possibly be linked to our own actions and thought processes, but a little education can go a long way! and the sooner we learn it, the sooner we can do something about controlling it.
A great start on understanding it is to watch What the Bleep do We Know; a movie -- more of a documentary, really -- which I found to be riveting. If you want to gain an insight into how your thoughts impact your everyday reality.... the Bleep is a must. I know, I've said it before! but if you're still having things happen in your life that you don't want, and you haven't found a way to get to this movie yet? Well... just get it. And once you can handle what the Bleep tells you, then I've got something that will REALLY blow your mind. But... first things first, eh?
Chew on that one for a while!
See you in a day or so.
Thursday, July 06, 2006
Schedule that in?
July 4th! How DID the year get to be half over already, without us noticing? Or, maybe you paid closer attention than I did. Regardless, it's been a good first half. I had a great 4th of July weekend, and hope you did, too. But, with 4 days *off* and I was going to get all kinds of stuff done -- build a web page or two, work on several projects, do some yard work (yuck). But, at the end of the four days, I had almost NOTHING done that I had planned. Four wasted days, right? Man!
A few weeks ago I was planning an evening out -- dinner and a movie -- with a lady friend. BTW, folks, I . . . am a planner, complete with 3 pound Franklin Planner system & Palm Pilot with "forever" calendar. It's a compulsion So, being the planner, -- and also wanting to make sure we had a good time -- I sought to find out when we would get together, since we both had crazy schedules. We found an open day a couple of days out, then I needed to know,"okay, where do we want to eat? What time do you want to eat? What movie, and shall we see the movie first and eat later? or eat first? Do I meet you at your house, or would you prefer to meet at mine or the theatre, or would you ra..."
My friend cut me off, looked me dead in my ear -- okay, we were on the phone so that's the closest I can come to a visual for what happened -- and said to me: "Have you ever heard of being spontaneous?" I said, "Of course, I've heard of being spontaneous; but I usually have to schedule that in !"
I could hardly believe I said that, but I did! Schedule in SPONTANEITY! Wow! Well, we had a good laugh over that, and I lightened up (a little), and we eventually got together and had a nice, relaxing evening. But we do! We get all wrapped up in our pursuits: our pursuit of happiness, our pursuit of money (which some people think is happiness), and we get wrapped up in the pursuit of our day-to-day existence, and that's all good! But, we forget that there is "stuff" in life, that we can and should just STOP ... and enjoy -- our family, our friends, sometimes just "ourselves" and our own being, without the burden of having to think, or do, or be productive, or creative or. . . pursue; just for a little while.
So, did I really have a wasted weekend? Oh no! Sunday, I spent the afternoon with a photographer friend and his friends and family, at his lake house, dodging dueling thunderstorms, eating, laughing, talking and having fun. Monday, I spontaneously invited some friends over and we talked and grilled and ate and laughed. A couple of hours after they left, my brother, Melvin, eased into town (12:45 a.m.) from Allentown, PA and we hung out for a while before retiring for the evening. The next morning we got up and had coffee "on the veranda" as he calls it -- I call it the deck on the back of the house. Then, we collected my "spontaneous" friend and went to breakfast, entertained several people in the restaurant (my brother is as nutty as me, and one of the other customers actually came up to us to tell us how much they enjoyed his laugh). Later on, I introduced him to a couple of other friends.
I have to tell you, folks, I love to share my brother with my friends. He is such an awesome person, has a heart of gold, and he makes me feel like I'm his hero. Me! L'il old Kelvin. There is nothing that I could have done on the web or the computer or via email that day, that could have made me feel better than the time I got to spent with my brother-- because we don't get to do that very often. So it was not a wasted weekend at all. It was great, and spontaneous, and rejuvenating.
Last Thursday night I had another spontaneous moment -- I went to the movies and saw "CLICK" with Adam Sandler. It was spontaneous because we decided at the last minute to go see a movie, and we didn't decide what movie we'd see until we were there. As it turns out, "CLICK" was an excellent choice and I highly recommend it to EVERY really busy person out there, with SO much to do that they're too busy to be SPONTANEOUS! Adam Sandler had a universal remote control -- you know the ones; you've seen them in the email jokes -- that helps him control his environment: fast forward through stuff you hate, pause to stop an argument, etc. etc. Schedule it in -- make it an appointment, to see that movie. Prepare to laugh, prepare to be touched, and prepare to think.
And you know, ladies and gentlemen, if you really ARE that busy... making an appointment with spontaneity is not a bad thing to do. Put it in your planner -- make it an appointment. NEXT SUNDAY, between 12:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m. make an (unbreakable) appointment with yourself to BE SPONTANEOUS! and during that time, do something FUN, goofy, relaxing. Drive somewhere you've never driven, have your family write some choices on the ground and throw some change in the air and do the thing that the most coins fall close to -- then have fun getting the money back before your kids get it all. Heck; make it fun. THROW $20's ! instead of change:-D. Do SOMETHING. . . to allow your psyche to relax, and appreciate the things around you that you -- we -- miss every day, because we're too busy to notice.
Take some time along the way to your success to have fun, so when you get there. . . you'll remember how to enjoy it.
Those are my thoughts for today.
As always, thank you for e-listening, & I look forward to hearing your comments and feedback
A few weeks ago I was planning an evening out -- dinner and a movie -- with a lady friend. BTW, folks, I . . . am a planner, complete with 3 pound Franklin Planner system & Palm Pilot with "forever" calendar. It's a compulsion So, being the planner, -- and also wanting to make sure we had a good time -- I sought to find out when we would get together, since we both had crazy schedules. We found an open day a couple of days out, then I needed to know,"okay, where do we want to eat? What time do you want to eat? What movie, and shall we see the movie first and eat later? or eat first? Do I meet you at your house, or would you prefer to meet at mine or the theatre, or would you ra..."
My friend cut me off, looked me dead in my ear -- okay, we were on the phone so that's the closest I can come to a visual for what happened -- and said to me: "Have you ever heard of being spontaneous?" I said, "Of course, I've heard of being spontaneous; but I usually have to schedule that in !"
I could hardly believe I said that, but I did! Schedule in SPONTANEITY! Wow! Well, we had a good laugh over that, and I lightened up (a little), and we eventually got together and had a nice, relaxing evening. But we do! We get all wrapped up in our pursuits: our pursuit of happiness, our pursuit of money (which some people think is happiness), and we get wrapped up in the pursuit of our day-to-day existence, and that's all good! But, we forget that there is "stuff" in life, that we can and should just STOP ... and enjoy -- our family, our friends, sometimes just "ourselves" and our own being, without the burden of having to think, or do, or be productive, or creative or. . . pursue; just for a little while.
So, did I really have a wasted weekend? Oh no! Sunday, I spent the afternoon with a photographer friend and his friends and family, at his lake house, dodging dueling thunderstorms, eating, laughing, talking and having fun. Monday, I spontaneously invited some friends over and we talked and grilled and ate and laughed. A couple of hours after they left, my brother, Melvin, eased into town (12:45 a.m.) from Allentown, PA and we hung out for a while before retiring for the evening. The next morning we got up and had coffee "on the veranda" as he calls it -- I call it the deck on the back of the house. Then, we collected my "spontaneous" friend and went to breakfast, entertained several people in the restaurant (my brother is as nutty as me, and one of the other customers actually came up to us to tell us how much they enjoyed his laugh). Later on, I introduced him to a couple of other friends.
I have to tell you, folks, I love to share my brother with my friends. He is such an awesome person, has a heart of gold, and he makes me feel like I'm his hero. Me! L'il old Kelvin. There is nothing that I could have done on the web or the computer or via email that day, that could have made me feel better than the time I got to spent with my brother-- because we don't get to do that very often. So it was not a wasted weekend at all. It was great, and spontaneous, and rejuvenating.
Last Thursday night I had another spontaneous moment -- I went to the movies and saw "CLICK" with Adam Sandler. It was spontaneous because we decided at the last minute to go see a movie, and we didn't decide what movie we'd see until we were there. As it turns out, "CLICK" was an excellent choice and I highly recommend it to EVERY really busy person out there, with SO much to do that they're too busy to be SPONTANEOUS! Adam Sandler had a universal remote control -- you know the ones; you've seen them in the email jokes -- that helps him control his environment: fast forward through stuff you hate, pause to stop an argument, etc. etc. Schedule it in -- make it an appointment, to see that movie. Prepare to laugh, prepare to be touched, and prepare to think.
And you know, ladies and gentlemen, if you really ARE that busy... making an appointment with spontaneity is not a bad thing to do. Put it in your planner -- make it an appointment. NEXT SUNDAY, between 12:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m. make an (unbreakable) appointment with yourself to BE SPONTANEOUS! and during that time, do something FUN, goofy, relaxing. Drive somewhere you've never driven, have your family write some choices on the ground and throw some change in the air and do the thing that the most coins fall close to -- then have fun getting the money back before your kids get it all. Heck; make it fun. THROW $20's ! instead of change:-D. Do SOMETHING. . . to allow your psyche to relax, and appreciate the things around you that you -- we -- miss every day, because we're too busy to notice.
Take some time along the way to your success to have fun, so when you get there. . . you'll remember how to enjoy it.
Those are my thoughts for today.
As always, thank you for e-listening, & I look forward to hearing your comments and feedback
Saturday, June 10, 2006
At this very moment...
At this very moment, my youngest son is on his way to see my mother. This is a huge event, because he is home on leave (U.S. Navy) from Naples, Italy. Mom knows he's coming to the states at some point but she has no idea that he'll come to see her.
My mom SO loves her grand children. This will be a bigger surprise than she may have ever had, because this is his first trip to see grand mom as an adult, on his own, and even without dad (that would be me.)
I cannot begin to tell you what joy this brings to my heart, knowing how my mom will feel when he shows up... in about 20 minutes. It brings tears to my eyes.
Ahhh... Sometimes it doesn't take much to have a really good day.
That's all.
You have a great day too.
Kelvin
My mom SO loves her grand children. This will be a bigger surprise than she may have ever had, because this is his first trip to see grand mom as an adult, on his own, and even without dad (that would be me.)
I cannot begin to tell you what joy this brings to my heart, knowing how my mom will feel when he shows up... in about 20 minutes. It brings tears to my eyes.
Ahhh... Sometimes it doesn't take much to have a really good day.
That's all.
You have a great day too.
Kelvin
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