Thoughts on Stress

Every once in a while someone send me a message too meaningful not to pass on. One of my new friends in Wisconsin sent me this piece today - said it reminded them of me. I take that as a compliment. I hope you enjoy it.

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A lecturer when explaining stress management to an audience,raised a glass of water and asked, "How heavy is this glass of water?"

Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.

The lecturer replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance. In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes."

He continued, "And that's the way it is with stress management. f we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on.

"As with the glass of water, you have to put it down and rest a while before holding it again. When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.

"So, before you go home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can."

So, my friend, Put down anything that may be a burden to you right now. Don't pick it up again until you've rested a while.

Here are some great ways of dealing with the burdens of life:

• Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.
• Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
• Always wear stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
• Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.
• If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
• If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
• It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to be kind to others.
• Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
• Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
• When everything's coming your way,you're in the wrong lane.
• Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
• You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
• Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
• We could learn a lot from crayons... Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names, and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.
• A truly happy person is one who enjoys the scenery on a detour.

Have an awesome day and know that someone has thought about you today. I did.

Kelvin

I Reserve the Right... To Change

This morning, I had breakfast with my friend Josh Shear (@josh_shear on Twitter). Josh is exceptionally well read and informed, has great insights, and we always have great conversations. Plus, he's a bit direct, so when he has something to say he tends to get to the point without a lot of fanfare.

For example, I noticed a couple of guitar cases in the corner of his living room, and I made an exceptionally astute observation, "Hey, Josh; you've got TWO guitar cases." Josh, in his Josh-like manner, said "Ya got two guitars, they won't fit into one case." That kind of direct (I smiled.).

When I walked into his kitchen, I was greeted by some very appetizing aromas. He'd prepared an excellent breakfast, timed to serve as soon as I arrived, so after some pleasantries he delivered this feast to the table and we chatted and consumed. I drank the lion's share of his double-brewed coffee, then after clearing away the breakfast dishes, we retired to his living room to finish catching up.

Having been duly informed regarding guitars, cases and the limitations of time and space, I asked whether he played guitar in any of the local establishments, and he said no. "I had a CD in 2003... sold them all and just have a few left." I held out my hand expectantly, saying, "well...what's up? I don't have one" and waiting for him to give up the bounty, and he stated quite matter-of-factly, "No."

"... that music is no longer representative of who I am."

I was stunned! but not for the apparent reason. I was not stunned that he said "No." I was stunned by the elegant simplicity of his statement!

How many people are TIED to an identity that no longer reflects who they are? TRAPPED inside identities they feel they cannot change? How many people do you know who are stuck in "that's just the way I am; I can't change it" or "people know me; this is what they expect of me..." How many people are saddled with an identity that is "no longer representative" of who they are -- or more importantly, who they want to be? Are you?

If you are, perhaps this is your own personal independence day. Anthony Robbins says, "the past does not equal the future." Who you were is not who you have to be!

So, repeat after me:

• "I reserve the right to change."
• "I reserve the right" to NOT be the person I was years ago.
• "I reserve the right" to be someone other than the person you thought I was back then.
• "I reserve the right" to become different, stronger, learn more, grow more, and get better.
• "I reserve the right" to leave behind an identity that does not empower me.
• Dear self: I am not that old self-limiting person I used to be. That image of me is no longer representative of who I am."

What a powerful, incredibly freeing concept. The next time you start to doubt yourself or feel a pull to do something that's not you anymore, go to your mirror and look into your own eyes and say, "I'm not that person! That stuff is no longer representative of who I am." Then pat yourself on the back for noticing ;-)

That's your first step. Stayed tuned for more.

Have an awesome day.

Kelvin

A Winning Attitude!

Every once in a while something happens that is especially exciting :-) This week, two such things made my day! I enjoy being a positive influence in people's lives and individuals often tell me how I've been helpful for them. But this week "my attitude" got shouted from the rafters, so to speak, when Syracuse Post-Standard reporter Amber Smith posted a news article featuring me, along with 4 others in Central New York, has having winning attitudes (http://tinyurl.com/qgoj2y). Works for me ! Thanks, Amber, for making me feel special.

Secondly, I did a portrait session for my friend and fellow photographer Renee Marquis. I've had people appreciate my work before, but Renee is making me feel like I'm the only photographer on the planet, and I don't mind that feeling either (even if it does leave me a lot to live up to. LOL). I'll defer to her comments regarding the images along with the cool slide show she put together. Thanks, Renee, for making me feel special.

There ya go. Elated... but humble.

Have a great weekend.

Kelvin

Take a Day to Celebrate YOU!

In our fast paced world, we are ever confronted with all the ads and hype that tell us we need to improve our lot, our looks, our lives, and every single facet of our existence. I, personally, am on a quest to daily improve myself and my skills, my health, the quality of my interactions and relationships with other people, my financial status.

But sometimes, we get so caught up in making our improvements that we forget to appreciate the person we are "today." While keeping our eyes on our goals and where we want to go and be, we sometimes forget to celebrate how far we may have come from where we *were* at one time. I fully believe in Tony Robbins' CANI (pronounced ka-nigh' : Constant And Never-ending Improvement), and like Dr. Charles Jarvis says, it's not enough to be "...yourself. You need to be your best self."

But the best self we are today, is different than the best self we were 5 years -- or even one year -- ago. We've learned more, lived more, realized more, overcome more, grown more. Each of us on the planet is a work in progress, and who and what we'll be tomorrow, will be built on the foundation of who we are today.

So celebrate who you are today! Take a day to relax from the hamster wheel of improvement, and luxuriate in the knowledge that you are a better person today than you were a year ago. Stand in front of a mirror, pat yourself on the back, look yourself in the eye and say, "Hey me! We're doin' okay. Thanks for being you." Then give yourself a wink, and walk away confident that you're the best you that you know how to be, today... and you can learn a little more tomorrow.

But for now, it's Celebrate "You" Day -- and you thought you'd never have a holiday named after you ;-)

Have an awesome day.

Kelvin