A Gift for You for 2010

This morning, I woke up at about 7:30.  Typically, I roll over, look at the clock, take a deep breath, then get up and start doing something -- coffee, turn on the laptop, walk around the house and find my planner so I can plot my day, kick the cat (just kidding; I don't have any animals -- not even a mouse; yay!).... just something besides waste time laying in bed. This morning was different.

This morning, I looked at the clock, took a deep, leisurely breath, turned back over, laid there, quiet, cozy and relaxed. As I did, I noticed the warmth of my bed (I'm probably the last remaining human on the planet with a heated waterbed) while I listened to the quiet of my house. Sometimes "quiet" has character.  I noticed that I was breathing slowly and deeply; and I felt my heart beating, strong but quiet. Then I noticed that I wiggled my toes, and I tuned into that feeling; and felt the blood moving through my system. I felt the texture of the covers on my skin and listened to the soft, rustling sound they made when I moved under them.

I opened my eyes and looked around my room and became aware that I could see things. [Normally we just "see" things, but we really don't take an active appreciation of the process.] The light through my bedroom windows had "life" and substance, and weight, and I contemplated the wonder of eyesight and how that all worked, and considered what magic really happens in my mind and body that allows me to feel the textures of those covers over me.

Minutes later, the quiet, muffled sounds of street activity seeped through the walls and floated into my consciousness as I heard -- actually felt -- the low vibrations of the distant vehicles driving down my street. Still noticing my breathing, and the textures on my skin, and my skin itself, I enjoyed the awareness that I was alive -- smiling with each new revelation. Was this meditation? or just relaxation? or what ?

Altogether, I laid there for about 10 minutes -- maybe fifteen -- then got up, and headed for the kitchen to make coffee. I made an aromatic pot of freshly ground "Vermont Maple Nut Crunch". I realized tonight -- as I was cleaning up my kitchen -- that the pot was still FULL. After all that, I didn't pour a single cup. That's how relaxed I was when I got up. I forgot I wanted coffee!!

I know what you're thinking... but there was no alcohol or foreign substance of any kind :) involved -- I just turned my attention inward and focused on "me" with new awareness.  Marcel Proust said, "The real voyage of discovery lies not in seeking new landscapes but in seeing with new eyes."

We are often taught, in our society, that it is improper to turn our attention to ourselves. We are taught that turning attention to ourselves is SELFISH. I submit that that concept is in error. I submit that we NEED to turn some of our attention -- and sometimes ALL of our attention -- inward, to ourselves, in the manner I've described here, so that we can realize what truly magnificent creatures we are -- YOU are.  Even the most "messed up" of us.  If we spend more time tuning in to the miracle of us, many of our self-image issues will disappear; and this year, I PLAN to spend some time pointing out the miracle of you and helping that happen.  But not now -- this post is already longer than I intended, so we'll have to wait until I write more, to hear more.

In the meantime, here is a gift you can give to yourself for 2010: WAKE UP, Slow Down, and TUNE In... to the miracle you are, and see yourself with new eyes.

That's it for now.  Have an awesome day.

Kelvin

When the student is ready...

On October 5th, 2005, I attended a leadership seminar at SUNY Upstate Medical University in Syracuse, NY, where I was an administrative assistant. The speaker was Bob Danzig, former CEO of the Hearst Newspaper empire -- quite an accomplishment for a kid that spent his early years bouncing from foster home to foster home.

Bob was soft-spoken and personable, and as people sauntered into the auditorium and took their seats, he walked around the room and met each one; shook their hand warmly, shared a smile and had a moment's conversation, until attendees were coming too quickly to continue. Later in his presentation he called several of those people by name.

Quietly but passionately, he spoke of leadership, of being a foster child, and how he rose to the pinnacle he had achieved, and he left us with a message: "You are full of promise !"

Somehow I won a CD set that day called "You Are Full of Promise - Life Lessons from Leaders" which I took home and put away to listen to later. "Later" turned out to be nearly 4 years later on August 23, 2009, just 5 days before I was to retire from my day job at SUNY. I was driving to Rochester for my 2 year old niece's birthday party (she's not really my niece, but my good friends Hai and Karen Tran let me be uncle Kelvin) I wanted some different music than was in my car so I looked through my collection and the CD set I received 4 years prior kind of fell into my hands. I decided it was a good time to listen to it, on my 2+ hour round trip to Rochester.

An incredible message -- the perfect message I needed to hear just 5 days before I struck out on my on. I remembered why I was moved when I first heard him, and his words managed to touch me deeply as I listened to that CD all the way there, and all the way back. So touched was I, that I emailed him when I returned home... late on a Sunday night, to tell him what effect his words had on me that day. To my great surprise... he wrote me back. I could hear his voice in his typed words as clearly as if he was sitting beside me, and somehow I was absolutely certain that he remembered me from that auditorium 4 years ago, and had been waiting for me to write.

I tell you this story, because I have come to believe -- or perhaps, to realize-- that there are no coincidences in life. Part of my note to him read, "Maybe it wasn't until today that I truly needed to hear the message you had to share..." and truly had I listened to that CD when I got it, it would not have had the same meaning, and would not have had the same effect. There's even more to the story, but that is for another place and time.

Right now, however, I'd really like to recommend this CD to you. If you are a leader, or you aspire to be a leader, I believe this CD is something you NEED to hear, and I defy you to listen to it and not be moved. You Are FULL of Promise -- near the bottom of the page. $15.95 including shipping.

Here's something you need to know:

• this is NOT an affiliate program, and I receive zero benefit -- other than feeling good -- if you buy the CD or any other product on his site
  
• all proceeds from the sale of any of his products go to support one of two charity causes -- click this link if you'd like to know what they are.

I try not to recommend a lot of things, but in my opinion, this CD is a must-have if you seek to lead. This CD set does not motivate. This CD set INSPIRES. It inspired me, and if you are -- or aspire to be -- a leader, it will inspire you; because you, too, are full of promise.

Have an excellent day.

Kelvin

Who's Your Competiton?

I'm talking "personal" competition.

Are you competing with the person down the street or "over there", so you can have what they have?

Or are you competing with you, because you know you can better and are capable of more...

If it's the first, I bet you have headaches...

Kelvin

The Pursuit of Happiness

When we're running the race to be successful, sometimes we get so wrapped up in the pursuit that we forget about the happiness part. It has been said that happiness is not the destination; happiness is the journey. The journey should leave us energized, invigorated and excited about life and it's possibilities.

If your journey (pursuit) is leaving you drained and unhappy and unpleasant to be around... something is out of whack. Maybe your goals, maybe your "why", maybe your expectations, or your balance. Or maybe you're just running so hard that you forget that every once in a while your batteries need re-charging.

Take a day off from the pursuit; take an intentional moment to sit and relax, concentrate on and enjoy the parts of your life that are good. Get back in touch with -- appreciate and be grateful for -- the good and positive things, people and circumstances that already exist in your world. Take a day to enjoy your existing happiness... then get back to the pursuit "tomorrow."

It will be a good thing. Trust me.

Kelvin

Born Leader... or not?

Born Leaders! They're out there, you know. We all know one -- resourceful, likeable, everything they touch turns to gold! Always on top of things, nothing ever phases them, nothing is ever a problem, nothing ever stands in the way of them winning; the epitome of "rags to riches" and "lemons to lemonade."

But, not all of us are so empowered, and if we happen to have that kind of success in one area of our life, we wonder why we don't have the same kind of success in the other areas of our life -- at least I do. How do I get off "pause" and press "play", and make my life work the way I want it to ?

A couple of weeks ago, I stumbled across something called ThinkTQ. It was an AdSense ad, really, on my friend Mitch's site. I don't remember why I went there, and have no idea why I clicked on the link -- I'm not a clicker. Yet, I clicked, and once I was there I became intrigued... then engrossed.

I've studied lots of success programs, read lots of books, listened to lots of tapes, yet somehow this one was different. It struck a different chord. Intentional Excellence! they call it, and they have a daily Lesson in Excellence - FREE. Intriguing. Not just a "motivational quote" but a complete daily lesson... with tips on how to make a difference "now." I don't know if it will have the same effect on you, but the first person I shared it with also became intrigued... then engrossed... then energized!

SO... I'm passing it on. I liked it so much that I incorporated their Daily Lesson in Excellence on my web site, and subscribed to their daily TQ.

So, if there's someplace you want to go, and you just can't quite seem to get there, but you really want to get off pause and get to "play", check it out. I'm not telling you to buy anything, I just want you to look around, kick the tires a bit. Check out the free stuff, the tests, read what they're all about... see how much you know about yourself.

I'm betting that you'll feel this is "something different." If you do, let me know.

ThinkTQ!

Kelvin

Conquer Self...

It really doesn't take much thought to "get" this. If we don't master ourselves, what we do, what and how we think, our own weaknesses and limitations, they will control us. That's a bit like getting in the car, pushing on the gas and letting go of the steering wheel.

Is that any way to run a life ?