My Most Prized Possession

People often tell me how I affect their lives in a positive way, but I rarely write about people who have affected my life in a positive way, at least not beyond the "general" sense.  But this has been a sweet week for me, in part because one of my dear friends and "little sisters" realized a great accomplishment this week, and her response to me for believing in her and encouraging her humbled me, and even made me a little teary (ever so briefly, says manly man.) But that will be another blog post.

In my office hangs a plaque, given to me some years ago by a tremendous friend -- Karen. I use only her first name because, well... she's shy, perhaps.  If she decides to identify herself further by commenting on this blog then you'll know.  But when I received the plaque from her, it was very humbling to me and truth be told... another one of those teary moments for me.  Why? Because this plaque, in it's few but tremendously powerful words, illustrated with a beautiful rendition of an eagle in flight -- epitomized what I try to do for people.  I love to help people and help them feel better about life and themselves.  I believe that's why I'm on the planet, and most of the things I do characterize that in some way.

This plaque, given to me all those years ago, has the same effect on me each and every time I read it. And I do not take for granted that anyone will feel this way about me every day, so each day I strive to continue to live up to these words, which I now present for your e-listening pleasure. May you strive to live up to them in YOUR life.  It reads:

EXCELLENCE: Excellence is the result of caring more than others think is wise; risking more than others think is safe; Dreaming more than others think is practical and expecting more than others think is possible.

To my friend Karen, thank you. These words continue to have the same effect on me as the day you gave them to me, and they always bring me back to a place of humility and gratitude.  Your gift -- this gift you gave me -- is in fact, my most prized possession.

Have a beautiful day, and life.

Kelvin

I know Christmas is over, but...

Many years ago when he was very young, my baby boy, Michael, was wrapping a Christmas gift for someone. At his (then) tender age, he considered it an expression of himself to "artistically" wad the wrapping paper around the gift, put a little tape and a ribbon on it, and call it a day.

Because I knew who's gift he was wrapping, I suggested to him that he might take a little more care in wrapping it, because if he were receiving a gift from that person, it would be lovingly and meticulously wrapped, and presented to him as a near work of art, and tried to impress upon him that sometimes the care and affection we put into something isn't to necessarily reflect our own desires, but rather to somehow recognize and show our appreciation for the love or care the other person would have put in it for us.

Pictured here is beautiful decoration for my tree, given to me by a loving friend who doesn't celebrate Christmas (at least, not usually) but because of our friendship, sent it to honor our friendship and my celebration.

It means a lot to me, on so many levels, and is one of the purist offerings of affection and appreciation I've ever received. 

To my friend, thank you for your affection and friendship.  I know you didn't expect any such recognition, but I wanted you to know how deeply appreciative I am of your gift, and that I will treasure you -- and it -- for all time.  May your upcoming year be as beautiful and kind and loving...as you are.

And that acknowledges -- in book --  yet another  Christmas Miracle.
 

Good day, my friends,
Kelvin

6 Days Before Christmas and...

Six days before Christmas and all through the house...LOL. Fooled you -- no poem.  Maybe next time. But a couple of days ago I published a Vitamin K (Daily Dose of Positive )-- and wished everyone a relaxed, stress-free weekend. One of my friends (you know who you are) wrote me back and said, "Relaxed? Stress-free? It's 7 days before Christmas; are you daft?"  Hmmm.  Well, first I had to look that up (sometimes it's the little words that get you).  Definitions were: senseless, stupid, or foolish, insane; crazy, merry; playful; frolicsome." And my answer is YES! All of the above :-), but NOT stressed!  And perhaps not stressed for the first time in my life, at the this time of the year; but for whatever reason, I'm not.  

Perhaps it's the retired status, or perhaps it's just my awareness that I can only do what I can do.  Then again, perhaps it's because this year I'm not so concerned about other people's expectations and more focused on my piece of mine (<-- that was for my friend Mitch. He likes to catch my mistakes. Make that "peace of mind.")

But, we're smack dab in the middle of THE season of peace, tranquility, love, appreciation, gratitude and good will for all mankind. Somehow, "stress" just seems so out of place.  Perhaps I am just fortunate not to be living a stressful life right now, or perhaps... I've just chosen to be stress free. Don't get me wrong... I KNOW there are people in the world who are deluged in stressful, painful situations right now and they can't be totally stress-free life at present, but for most of us... most of the people I know... the stress is optional... but for the "things" we're focusing on, and the meaning we are voluntarily assigning to those things. LOTS of people are giving gifts this season that are attached to so much stress they can hardly see.  But, I'd like to suggest that... no matter what you BUY this Christmas... that the gifts you GIVE are love.. warmth... appreciation... gratitude... and acceptance.  Those will go further than the material thing(s) you attach to them, and I guarantee you'll feel better about you.

Incidentally, you also need to give yourself the gifts of love, gratitude and acceptance; because despite what most marketers and some of your acquaintances might tell you... you're okay. Even precious diamonds have imperfections. Then again, it is we who define imperfect...  And if you're having some challenges with that... perhaps you might enroll in my Daily Dose of Vitamin K. We cover those points often. It was planned  to be on sale now, but it's not yet... so take advantage of it for now and we'll just call it my Christmas gift to you (and anyone you pass that link onto between now and when I finally get the sale page online.) You can check out a few comments here. And who knows, maybe by the time you get there...there will be a few more.

So that's it, my friends. I wish for you a stress-free holiday season; focused on the things that really matter, as you give the gifts of  love, gratitude and acceptance... regardless of what "physical" gifts you attach to them.

Have a beautiful week.  And incidentally... there's an excellent video on Mitch's blog that it would be good for everyone to see, this time of year especially. So if you didn't click it, go ahead and click on his name / link and watch it. Take a stress-free 16 minutes and check it out.


Love and Light to you ;-)
Kelvin

I'm Thankful For It All

It's been a beautiful year so far, not to be confused with a year where everything went as I'd planned. I've been a party to making some people happy, helping some dreams come true, facilitating some folks and helping them see through and beyond life's fog, and have had others do the same for me.  I've experienced some wonderful highs, and some less than wonderful lows, and there's a good chance I've been part of a low for someone else.

You  might think it ludicrous that I am thankful for the lows as well as the highs, but they both are part of the duality of life, so explains my friend Dr. Wayne Dyer (no, we've not met or talked by I call him friend anyway, because I have learned from him.) Because without a low, there is no high; without a back, there is no front.  Each of my experiences this year -- happy and not so happy -- has contained a lesson which has benefited me, and as we know... it takes struggle and resistance to make muscles strong.

Now, don't get me wrong.  I am pleased to say that my life has experienced predominantly ups... for which I am extremely grateful; but even within the disappointments, I can still point to momentous smiles, so I'm thankful for it all.  Among all the things I'm thankful for, I'd like to list a few of the most significant:

1. I am blessed with excellent health and vitality, often in spite of my apparent efforts to the contrary ;-)
2. I am blessed with the gift of speaking and writing that touches people's souls, and further blessed that many have let me know how I've affected them. That knowledge itself... is a gift beyond measure, for me.
3. I'm blessed with having some of the best and most caring friends a person can have; most of them I've met -- but some of them, I have not.
4.  I have been blessed to love -- and be loved -- on many different levels, and though the highs of that have not always lasted, the memory of them has.
5.  I am  blessed to see blue skies and sunshine, even in a storm, and blessed to hear birds singing, even when there is no sound.
6.  I am blessed to wake up each morning with a smile in my heart, if not on my face (but it catches up soon)  and blessed that something happens nearly everyday that leaves me -- at night -- feeling glad that I was part of that day.

7. I am blessed with a beautiful family, the shining stars of which are three awesome children who are healthy, self-sufficient, self reliant and all contributing to society in a meaningful way... and oh yeah... I'm pretty sure they all love me, too ;-)  Plus, I laugh almost daily with my 82 year old mom, though less frequently with my brother and sisters.

That's just the tip of my list... which goes very deep.  And, occasionally, I break out the long yellow pad and fill it up, just to keep perspective.

So today, my friends, as you celebrate Thanksgiving (and maybe even if you don't), when you give thanks,  however and to whomever you give thanks, please... do it with some degree of intensity. Make your list, so that when you say "thank you" it has some weight and mental energy behind it.  Someone once said that "love makes the world go round, but it's money that greases the wheels."  Personally, I think it's GRATITUDE that greases the wheels.


Have an absolutely incredible day, and thank you for allowing me to be a part of your life.

Appreciatively yours,
Kelvin

Memorial Day - A Personal Perspective

I joined the Air Force in 1971 -- graduated from high school in May, and entered basic training on September 13th. It would be a few years before Vietnam wound down.  They taught us how to run and climb, how to shoot, how wear gas masks. We knew that we were in the military and might have to fight, but the overwhelming feeling was that odds are we wouldn't -- especially in my career field -- so we could concentrate on getting our education, racking up some GI bill and having a life. But we drilled, we served, we prepared, we supported, all through my 20 years.  Less than a year before I retired, the first Gulf War broke out. Certain career fields were held up; retirements / leaves were cancelled. Depending on the career field, some people were even pulled back into service after discharge.  I retired on schedule.

Today when people join the military -- especially the Army and Marine Corps -- I don't believe there's that kind of delusion because these two services are first line of defense. If there's "stuff" going on... when they join,  they pretty much know they're going to see some combat time.  Such is the case with my oldest son, Kelvin.  He joined the Army in January of 2002 -- less than 4 months after 9/11. Since then he's done two tours in Iraq, and is now serving in Afghanistan. I said initially that he didn't know what he was getting himself into, but he's re-enlisted twice so far, and clearly there was no doubt what the score was when he re-enlisted each time, and he still made that choice.  I don't tell him often enough, but I have immense pride and respect for him. I love you, son, and I'm proud of you.

My baby boy, Michael, joined the Navy in May of 2004. For sure, he had a whole different mind set than Kelvin, Jr.  Michael went in the Navy to grow up... and he's done a lot of that. I'm pretty sure that war zones weren't on his mind at the time, especially since his initial assignment was two years on land in Italy. But he re-enlisted, too. And now he's assigned to one of the Navy's most advanced warships -- a guided missile destroyer. He was on the crew that took it from Bath, ME to commissioning and now officially operational and preparing for it's true mission. So in a couple of months, he'll probably be in one of those zones. It's been interesting watching him grow from the pig-headed teenager into the military man he is today. He complains a bit more than Kelvin Jr, but when it's time to get the job done... he's all Navy. I don't tell him often enough, but I have immense pride and respect for him. I love you, son, and I'm proud of you.

We all need to have tremendous pride and respect  for anyone who joins any branch of the military today. There's no draft, so everyone who goes in, goes in on purpose.  And everyone who stays in, stays in on purpose. There are many among us who would not take up the challenge and the risk of being a military member, but we all benefit from the dedication and sacrifice of the ones who do.

When you see a military person, say "thank you" like you mean it -- he or she is a VOLUNTEER.  They don't have to be there; they don't have to stay, but they do. They know what the score is, and they do it anyway. And regardless of what you think of the war, you should have pride, and respect and gratitude... for the military man and woman who was -- and is -- willing to voluntarily fight it.

When you make out your gratitude list tonight... be sure to include them on it.

Have an awesome day.

Kelvin P. Ringold, Sr, MSgt, USAF, Retired
Proud & Grateful Parent of TWO Military Men

I Fired the Boss!

I found this button some years ago. Oddly, I think I found it in the drawer of my new desk, when I started my last job. It was a job I was actually pretty happy with. It seemed I'd fallen into the perfect setup -- the perfect job for me, with the perfect boss. I've written about him previously, so I won't rehash that now. Suffice it to say, I decided long ago that he would be the last supervisor I ever worked for. He raised the bar so, that I couldn't see myself ever working for anyone else.

But at the close of business next Friday -- August 28, 2009 -- I declare Kelvin's Independence Day, because despite how great Bob Shprintzen was to work for, I have a personal dream -- in The Alchemist he calls it a personal legend -- that outgrew the job. As much as I loved helping the people that I connected with through Dr. Shprintzen, I believe I have a greater purpose and can be of greater service pursuing my dream; so... here go, I.

So, although the button says "I fired the boss," it's not strictly true. It was a very tough decision, and a huge chunk of my heart stays with him and his VCFS practice, and the friends I have made over the last 12 years, among both staff and patients. And I sincerely hope that part of my thanks and legacy to him enables me to help raise funds he needs to keep that practice running, because he does a great work at the VCFS International Center for the 1-in-1200 children born yearly with that syndrome.

If you check the VCFS Center link, watch the video. If you watch long enough you'll even see my big head pop up in one of the scenes during a team consult.

"Thank you, Dr. Shprintzen" for giving me the admiration and opportunities you have in the past 12 years, treating me like a member of your family, and for being wholly supportive in my decision to leave, even though you know it cripples your program. (That's the kind of man he is.) "Thank you, world," for giving me the opportunity to be a bigger part of the grand plan. I won't let you down.

Have an awesome day, all.

Kelvin

Customer Service: Alive and Well at Sears!!!

800#s and voice mail loops. HATE them. Yes, occasionally there's a happy ending.

My garage door opener decided to go whacko last month. It thought there was something in the way so the safety sensors wouldn't let it close. I ended up disconnecting the door from the motor so I could close it. The maintenance contract was long expired, I dreaded every minute of thinking how much it would cost me to get it fixed. I kept hearing the conceptual cha-ching of SEARS' cash register -- I think it's like $129 for them to get in the truck, then there's parts and labor... So for two weeks or so, I'd drive home, get out of the car, manually lift the garage door, prop it open (too heavy to stay up by itself), pull the car in, go put the door down, etc... Tedious and annoying.

So I finally broke down and called Sears and their automated menu system that asked me technical type questions -- does the door stop and the lights flash 10 times...? -- so it could put me in the right menu. THEN, when I got a LONG recording that gave me troubleshooting tips for all those symptoms. "I've done all that!"

I was annoyed until I realized they were actually trying to save me money by checking things I'd be paying the technician to check on site. But alas, I'd done all they suggested was finally grant phone audience with a REAL person. I wish I remember the man's name at the Craftsman Garage Door Opener Center (honest) in Tucson! Let's call him Dave.

Dave asked for my phone number & verified I was in fact a SEARS customer, then asked what the problem was. I told him. I ALSO told him I'd already done that long list of stuff the recording said to do. He laughed, then sent me into my garage with phone in hand to go through that same checklist, and tell him what I was seeing. Things still weren't making sense. Dave ascertained that I was a pretty technical guy (ha!), WAITED on the phone for me to move my car out of the garage, so I could do some other tests (part of which involved wire cutters and screwdrivers and by-passing circuits to verify where the problem was.) He waited patiently for me to fumble through all of that -- no huffs, no muffled comments -- then figured out where the problem was. Then he told ME how to fix it, and wished me a good day.

No "can I have your credit card number?," no "We'll need to send a technician out, Mr. Ringold." Nothing. NO charge, no ads, no up-sell to another maintenance contract; just pleasant, patient technical assistance, and sent me on my merry way, with my $200 (or more) still in my bank account. THANKS, Dave!

It's been a while since I experienced that kind of service -- especially from a large company. I just thought it was worth mentioning. Maybe I'll go ahead and renew that maintenance contract on my grill -- it's cheaper than the cost of replacing the burners ;-) and I might not get Dave to talk me through that one :-) Yeah!

Have an awesome day.

Kelvin

Have a Frivolous Friday!

I was talking with a friend a few weeks back, and she was telling me about one of her co-workers who as upbeat and positive and liked to add adjectives to his daily greetings, like marvelous Monday, terrific Tuesday, wonderful Wednesday and the like. After all, "marvelous Monday" is much more uplifting than, "Ugh... back to the grind."

I thought it a rather smashing idea, and considering you shouldn't use the same adjective each week, can become quite challenging coming up with new ones. BUT... I love it. Yesterday could have been a thundering Thursday, for instance.

At any rate, today I borrow the thing that my friend borrowed from her co-worker. I wish you a Frivolous Friday! Do something fun today -- make someone smile ! (someone new, not just the normal crowd you pal around with.) Make it a movement to SPREAD a little joy!

I'll be listening to see how creative you got :-)

Have a happy!

Kelvin